monumental 2.0

I got some good feedback--thanks!--and I've incorporated much of it. Most of the feedback hit on the same points that I had privately noted for myself. That's good news for me in that other people try and convince me I'm hypercritical. Now I know I'm just right. :) Here's where it currently stands. It looks like it's working toward becoming a clumsy sonnet, but I'm not feeling bound by literary conventions at the moment.

What monument to thee, my God, could convey thy grandeur,
What lofty height of man’s design impart thy grace,
What sparkling glass reflect thy splendor,
Or carvéd rock reveal thy face?
Such follies do men build for thee,
And treasure stores amass,
To mimic thy heavenly beauties
Which all earthly work surpass.
No, no monument to thee will I offer
Nor semblance of thy state will I effect,
But thy image marked on me to all I proffer
In hope thy vessel thou wilt perfect.

I was in bed with the lights off trying to put myself into a happy dreaming attitude and had to get up out of bed to work on this some more. Grumble, grumble, grumble...Great. Now the phone's ringing! Aaargh!!

monumental

What monument to thee, my God, could convey thy grandeur,
What lofty height of man’s design impart thy grace,
What sparkling glass reflect thy splendor,
Or carvéd rock reveal thy face?

No monument to thee will I then offer
Nor semblance of thy state will I effect,
But thy image marked on me to the world I proffer
With hope thy image in me thou wilt perfect.

I wrote this yesterday while sitting at the Navy Memorial. We've been subject recently to some poor writing at work in which WNC was referred to as a "monument". Needless to say, that kicked off a round of argument from our departmental point of view. I think, the juxtaposition of that internal document and my having a few free minutes at the Navy Memorial is what brought this on. I feel like it needs a transitional second stanza, but know that I also have a tendency to overwrite. Thoughts?

say a little prayer for me

I'm being asked to provide more and more input on our public prayers these days. Today alone I've been asked to draft several pieces, tweak others, and cobble together prayers from a variety of source material.

Here are some of the things I've worked on today.

COLLECT
O God, our Creator,whose grace extends like fruitful vines: Make us good stewards of your vineyard that we may mindfully labor in the care of your creation, joyfully share the bounty of your grace, and endlessly praise the wonder of your works; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

This is the concluding collect for the prayers of the people on Oct. 5. The PB will be in town that day and my boss started worrying today that the prayers weren't quite perfect enough yet. This is the first time something I've written has been accepted on first draft. Of course, that led to this:

PETITION FOR THOSE FREAKING OUT ABOUT THE ECONOMY
We pray for those who suffer the anxiety and fear of financial distress, and for all those charged with the equitable use of public wealth. Encourage them and us to practice wise economy, that we may be always generous.

This will be used in the prayers of the people on Sept. 28. I started with the prayer for the unemployed in the BCP and took a strong influence from the Song of Lao Tsu (WLP 803). I haven't really lifted phrases from those sources, more that the final collect bears the impression of ideas in those works. The petition will befollowed by silence and then "We lift our prayers to you, O God;" to which the people respond, "You are the hope of all creation." The responsory part was written by someone else; but the title (which appears no where in print) is all mine.

A PRAYER FOR ELECTIONS
Almighty God, to whom we must account for all our powers and privileges:grant the people of the United States eager resolve in the exercise of civic duty; entrust her citizens with wisdom and discernment for the public good; and guide this nation in the election of trustworthy officials and sound representatives that, by ethical process and just law, the rights of all may be protected and the needs of our society be met. Amen.

Needless to say, no good deed goes unpunished and, the next thing you know, I'm working on prayer cards. Once again, the BCP shares the credit for this--wherever credit is being given. For a variety of reasons prayers are shaped to suit the needs of our community, so I did get to play a bit with this one. I kinda like it. I'm sure it will get revised by others, but it is a bit of a novelty to be trusted to do the first draft of a prayer.

I'm now fried, having spent a good portion of the day unexpectedly writing prayers. Time for me to go back to paper cutting.

ply the needle, mother

Lord, help me thread the needle
For my sight has almost gone.
Houses nearly shattered,
the fabric has been torn:
Lord, your bride is tired and weary
And her dress is none too clean.
But I’ll ply the needle, mother,
To mend your tattered seam.

Lord, help me work the needle
Warp and woof are pulled apart:
--doors flung off their hinges
and windows painted shut—
Lord, your children strive for faithful
But are often cruel and mean.
Still, I’ll ply the needle, mother
To mend your tattered seam.

Lord, help me hold the needle
For my joints are stiff and sore.
--brothers in the courthouse
and sisters gone to war!
Lord, my heart is near to breaking
And my fingers crack and bleed.
Still I’ll ply the needle, mother,
To mend your tattered seam.

Lord, help me drive the needle
Through this coarse and ragged cloth.
I can’t see the pattern;
the color’s all but lost...
Lord, please help me drive the needle
And I’ll help reweave the dream.
Then we’ll ply the needle, mother,
To mend your tattered seam.

Yes! We'll ply the needle, mother,
To mend your tattered seam.